02 Mar How to get where you want to be
Life without a plan or structure is just a blob.
Self-discipline is ALL we need.
OK. Hear me out.
Cultivating self-discipline and structure doesńt sound fun, but it can be extremely satisfying, and it´s ALL you need to get from where you are now to where you want to be.
There is freedom in commitment and structure, lack of it creates chaos and unsettledness.
We need structure, purpose, and freedom to experience true satisfaction in life. Our essence holds the quality of being and creating. Shiva and shakti.
This is the time of the year many of you have been setting goals, or some of you have been disappointing yourself for so many years already that you have given up on goal setting.
I get that, goal setting has been extremely challenging for me because I had no structure and no idea how to work towards goals without creating a ton of stress for myself.
However, without goals, there is no direction, no need to create any structure, or a plan, and we become the said blob.
A “blob” lacks a defined shape or structure. If you are moving through life without a plan, it expresses itself as a sense of formlessness or disorganization.
Well, you can imagine how that presents itself in your life. It can be a pile of mess that has been sitting somewhere for years, it can be a project that never got started, it even can be your health.
The problem here is that us wanting things to change is taking up a lot of energy even when we don’t do anything about the things we want to change.
In other words: chaos. The mind loves to ´click´ into something for it to relax. The default of the mind is to revert to negativity if we let it wander, so you can give it a better job by offering something else instead.
There is tremendous relief and clarity that comes with taking action
Having a plan provides structure and direction, helping you navigate your way through life. It adds purpose and clarity to your journey.
It serves as a framework, allowing us to shape and bring new ideas or aspirations into reality with more precision and efficiency.
Just like an architect’s design guides a builder in creating a sound building.
Can you see there exists freedom in structure, planning and commitment.
How to create more structure, planning and commitment.
Well, first of all, you need a plan.
What you will have to do to get a sense of flow and ease in doing what is hard is – sticking to the plan.
Step 1. Set Clear Goals: obviously, you need to know what you want, yeah I get it, that is maybe the hardest question. Please do not waste time on your why. That is a rabbit hole, just focus on the what.
Step 2. Identify what you need: do you need to gear up? Get gym clothes? Find a coach? Setup a space for meditation? Get a productivity timer? Keep it simple. You don’t need to build a full gym at home.
Step 3. Break down the tasks: work backwards, if your goal is A, backtrack to the first step. So let´s say, your goal is to create youtube videos on your baking. Obviously, you need a camera, a mic, a place to setup for filming, and ideas of cakes that you will be baking.
Start with choosing the recipes, then write a script for the video you will be filming, then plan a day where you will do the baking and filming, then plan a day where you will launch the video.
Or, if your goal is to get fit. Choose which days and what time of the day (when you have the most energy) you will be working out, decide where you will be training, prepare your gear, get a program or even better a coach, decide what you will do on the days it feels impossible.
Step 4. Commit to Habits: See how you can create structure in your days that include your goals as a part of your daily habits. For example, I have my coffee every day first thing in the morning, it´s a ritual and a habit. Since consistent creative writing is my goal, I sit down at the dining table, light a candle, set a timer for how long I want to write, get my coffee and write.
For you it might be doing push-ups after brushing your teeth, or meditation before you prepare dinner.
Step 5. Find an accountability partner: social pressure works miracles, let someone who cares about your well-being and progress know what your plan is, and keep them in the loop on your progress, successes and struggles. If you like, you can use social media for this. You don’t need to share your goals and plans online, you can simply share your habits and actions.
Step 6. Feel proud. Very important to allow yourself to feel the achievement of doing what you promised yourself to do. This gives your brain the reward chemicals that it needs to repeat. Don’t skip over this. Take a moment each time to acknowledge and appreciate your efforts.
Add some quantum physics magic
Practice feeling what its like to finally do the things that have been haunting you for years. Imagine what it feels like in your body once you are in the flow of doing and achieving what you have been wanting for a long time.
For me, it´s almost always, a tremendous sense of relief from the nagging mind reminding me that I have not been doing the things that I told myself I would be doing. It feels like my body is melting and relaxing and the clouds are lifting, and sometimes even a hint of joy and excitement.
Pretty good stuff, I know.
With love,
and appreciation,
Lydia